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Quick Questions…Important

Tanner
Thoughtfully composed by Tanner
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Filed under: Wedding

Hey everyone. Don’t want to take up much of your time, because I know all of you are busy, but I have a couple of quick questions for all of you.

Lacey and I have been thinking about writing a book that goes along the same lines as this website. Basically, the book would be something like “500 Tips and Tricks to Save or Make Money on Your Wedding…” or something else.

Would you be interested in this type of book?

Would you be interested in an audio book or instructional DVD as well?

Any better ideas on a topic or is this a pretty captivating idea?Â

Please make sure to comment and let us know what you think!!

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It’s Been a While…

Lacey
Thoughtfully composed by Lacey
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Filed under: Wedding, Wedding Dress, Wedding Photography

Unfortunately it’s been a while since we’ve posted anything. Tanner and I have been much busier. In fact, we have both moved from part-time to full time jobs. We’re both also taking a summer class twice a week for 4 hours a night. I’m also taking another 2 classes online. So, I apologize for the big time lapse. Hopefully we’ll both be settled in soon, and back to regular blogging.

An update:
- I purchased my wedding dress - I bought it at a small boutique. It was on their sale rack. It cost me $200, and the dress was marked down from $900. I love the dress, and it’s beautiful. I was able to reveal it to my mother (who visited me from CT) and my to-be mother-in-law at the same time, and they both love it.

and now, a tip about finding wedding services:

Using Myspace to Find Wedding Services

- That’s right, we’re on myspace and so are wedding vendors. I found a photographer who lives in Vegas, who studied art, not photography (so his pictures are artistic, not just snapshots), who offered to photograph me and Tanner ALL DAY for $400, and place the pictures on a cd for us, so we can use whatever cheap service we want to print the pictures. We don’t know if we’ll use him, but Myspace has proven effective at finding cheap services. I don’t know if it’s the best way, but definitely give it a try. We have had several offers from various vendors around the country.

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Questions to Answer Before You Get Married

Lacey
Thoughtfully composed by Lacey
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Filed under: Marriage, Engagements, Counseling

From the most recent issue of Comsopolitan, Here are some questions to ask yourself before you:

Move in Together

- Am I moving in with him mainly to get distance from my parents or to prove that I’m an adult?
- Am I doing this because I don’t think I can make it alone and I assume s/he’ll take care of me?
- Was this decision prompted because it makes life more convenient or is it a great financial deal?
- Am I running away from a bad living situation or roommate?
- Can I tolerate their daily habits?
- Do I feel relaxed enough around them to reveal my flaws?
- Have we discussed duties? Who cleans and when? Or have we agreed to hire someone?
- Will we split our rent down the middle or does it depend on whose salary is bigger?
- Have we set rules about how often friends and family may stay over?
- How will we merge our decorating tastes? Do either of us have items we’re not willing to give up?
- Am I prepared to have someone always in my space?
- Does s/he drink/smoke too much?
- What is /her/his financial track record?
- Has s/he been financially dependent on prior girlfriends?
- What do our recurring fights tend to be about? Do we believe that cohabitation will fix those issues?
- Could our routine spats get worse when we share such close quarters? How have we prepared for that?
- Am I hoping this will lead to getting engaged? If so, does he know that and share the goal of marriage?
- If we split up, how will we divide our assets?

Before Getting Engaged

- How much do I expect him/her to spend on a ring relative to his income? Does s/he know this?
- What is the first thing I’ll be excited about when they propose, the ring or spending our lives together?
- Does being with her/him make me truly happy - happier then I was before - or am I just relieved to have a fiance?
- Am I doing this because it feels right or is it because I have an internal time lime?
- Do I feel pressured because my friends are engaged or my family is pushing me?
- Does s/he take responsibility and know how to say “I’m sorry” or does s/he stonewall me?
- What kind of friends and friendships does s/he have?
- Does s/he put their friends ahead of our relationship?
- Are we moving at the same pace or is one of us rushing the other to take this next step?
- When I have pangs for old flames, are they random and fleeting or do they leave me longing?
- Has s/he ever flirted or been touchy-feely with others while dating me? If so, am I convinced they now understand appropriate boundaries?
- Do we have the same ideas about where to live?
- What are her/his long term values and goals in terms of her/his career? Wealth? Relationships? Family? Health? Are those compatible with mine? Do I expect any of those to change - for either of us - down the line?
- Would I be prepared to move if they got a great job in another state?

Before Getting Married

- Can s/he put up with my relatives and can I put up with hers/his?
- Are either of us cut off or over-involved with our families?
- Have we discussed our family health histories?
- Have we discussed whether or not we want kids, how many, and how we want to raise them?
- Are we on the same page about our careers? Does one of us want to stay at home?
- Would s/he be cool with my desire to work - or not - after kids?
- Would I be okay with if if I were the breadwinner? Would s/he?
- Would he be okay with it if I keep my last name?
- Do I feel comfortable “marrying” into his social circle of friends?
- If one of her/his parents turned on me, would s/he stand up for me or would I have to fight for myself?
- What’s her/his idea of the right way to discipline children?
- What are our values (family, religion, politics) and do they mesh?
- Do we have similar definitions of what quality leisure time is and how our vacations should be spent?
- Will I be incurring any of her/his debts or will s/he be incurring any of mine?
- Do we plan on having separate bank accounts or creating one that we will both share?
- Is s/he open to going to therapy to work through problems if we need to one day? Am I?
- If s/he doesn’t change and what I’m getting now is exactly what s/he’s going to be and nothing better, will I still be content with her/him?

So you’ve got your engagement ring. What’s next? Planning your wedding! Choosing the perfect wedding bands is very important, whether they’re simple and soft or covered in loose diamonds.

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How to Save Money on Your Wedding Dress

Lacey
Thoughtfully composed by Lacey
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Filed under: Wedding Attire, Wedding Dress, Wedding Accessories, Brides

Hello,

I have been super busy with a job change and having just visited my family. Tanner is also away on business right now.

Well anyways, today I went wedding dress shopping with a future bride friend. My savings tip: Buy designer wedding dresses at reduced prices off the sale rack. Who cares if it’s from 3 seasons ago! It’s still a pretty dress right?

I tried on a BEAUTIFUL dress and fell in love with it instantly. I would describe it, or post a picture of me trying it on, but it’s supposed to be kept a secret from Tanner. Guess how much the dress was marked off - it is $200 marked down from $900. $200 is a great price, better then what I was hoping for, and it was originally much more expensive then that! I am calling on Monday to make sure the dress is still there, and then picking it up after work. I’ll probably go to Tanner’s Mom’s house to show it off to her (I will be too excited to not show someone, and she is the only person that lives close lol).

Remember: dresses off the sale rack can’t usually be ordered, so they have to be the right size, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be altered.

Now all I have to do is find a headpiece, veil, jewelry, and shoes and my wedding attire will be done!

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Save Money on Alcohol for Your Wedding Reception

Tanner
Thoughtfully composed by Tanner
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Filed under: Reception, Wedding Planning, Saving Money, Wedding Alcohol

This might be a little tricky, because Caterers and Reception Halls often force you to retain their services for serving alcohol and liquor at your wedding reception, but I plead with you to STAND UP for yourself and tell them that you will find someone else if they will not let you provide your own alcohol.

wedding alcohol

Buying your own alcohol and hiring your own bartender is the absolute cheapest way to have an open bar at a wedding. Caterers will charge you thousands for something that should only cost you hundreds.

First: Hire a bartender/s to serve the alcohol:

The absolute first place I would visit would be Craigslist for your town. Go to the ‘Services’ section and peruse the site for bartenders that are offering their services. Try searching using the keyword ‘bartender’ or ‘alcohol’. If you cannot find anyone already offering their services, try posting a message saying “Hiring: Bartender for One Day Wedding Reception.” Tell them that you will pay them $50 or $100 for the reception services and they will receive all of the tips (which will probably be over $200 after the day is over). Amateur (but good) bartenders will be swarming you with emails offering their services at this point.

You will want to have face-to-face interviews with the potential bartenders to see if they have an OK “look” and if they will be professional. You can also have them give you demonstrations of serving alcohol. Maybe have them serve several common drinks, like a cosmopolitan, margarita, and martini in an impromptu fashion to see how well they will do.

wedding liquor

Second: Buy the liquor for your wedding:

This is the part that is FUN. I would have so much fun spending several hundred dollars at a liquor store. Great times. Below, I will list the calculations for how much alcohol to buy. The numbers are going to be a little funny, but that is fine.

The alcohol amounts are provided assuming 100 guests. If you need to do the calculations for 50 guests, just halve the numbers.

Beer – (Total 9 dozen)
Three dozen each of domestic, imported and light beers

Wine – (Total 5-8 dozen bottles)
Chardonnay - 3-4 dozen bottles
Sauvignon Blanc - 1-2 dozen bottles
Cabernet Sauvignon (red) - 1-2 dozen bottles

Champagne – 1-2 dozen bottles

Hard Spirits
Vodka – 5L
Gin – 3L
Rum – 2L
Scotch – 2L
Bourbon – 2L
Vermouth - 750ml
Kahlua – 3L

Sweet and flavored liquors: (About 1 liter of each)
Bailey’s Irish Cream (heavy Irish cream)
Grand Marnier or Triple Sec (orange)
Amaretto (cherry)
Sambucca (licorice)
Brandy (whatever flavors)
Frangelico (hazelnut)
Chambord (raspberry)

Also, to help you save money (but upset the snobby guests)….buy the cheap liquors and either don’t let people watch while they are made (stupid) or just pour the drinks without even making a fuss about it. Who’s gonna complain?? Free drinks!

I promise you that buying your own wedding alcohol will save you TONS of money!

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